I Was Meant to Be a Fat Person

What is the proper response to the statement: I was meant to be a fat person? Given the natural balance of the universe it doesn't make sense to me that you can't eat all the delicious things available without getting fat and unhealthy. Does it seem protective of our species to have all delicious things be ultimately bad for you? Does it seem biologically logical that fat makes everything taste good?

I have decided that when I am old I will eat whatever I want and not worry about getting fat. How wonderful would it be to eat slice after slice of warm just-baked bread slathered with butter and not have a worry about what it's doing to your body?

Gruyere sourdough, spelt, and fig walnut multigrain breads at the Wickaninnish Inn

Or eat ALL the desserts on the menu INSTEAD of vegetables and ask for EXTRA whip cream?

Local summer berries in the shortcake at RauDZ

We have just returned from a vacation in British Columbia.  The west coast is full of amazing restaurants: RauDZ Regional Table in Kelowna,

Flatbread with grilled asparagus, arugula, bacon lardons, brie, caramelized onions and rhubarb chutney at RauDZ

Shelter in Tofino, Blue Water Cafe in Vancouver where they make sablefish that literally melted in my mouth and where I had the best dessert ever of lemongrass creme brulee along with a tiny perfect carrot cake sitting in a sea of papaya salsa topped with a scoop of ginger ice cream.

Tuna appetizer at Shelter

At the Pointe restaurant at the Wickaninnish Inn in Tofino the dining room has a 240 degree view of the ocean and the food is delicious.

Pea ravioli with chanterelle mushrooms at Wickaninnish Inn

The only thing in my way was the annoyingly inadequate size of my stomach. And the nagging voice in my head predicting the dire outcome of eating yet more ice cream. I tried my best and actually did quite well. However now that I'm home it is time to diet. I hate to diet. I hate depriving myself of things that I want. Hence my statement: I was meant to be a fat person. BTW, the proper response is NOT: If you get fat I will divorce you! I'm sure when he said it that the Hubby was himself suffering from food-induced insanity. If he had been in a proper state of mind I'm certain he would have said "I'll join you!" or some variation on that theme. Until then, pass the celery please!

Zero Mile Dinner

We are in British Columbia and enjoying the west coast hospitality of the Hubby's cousin Michele and her hubby Marty. M&M live on 25 acres in the hills just outside of Kelowna. The views are breathtaking. M&M grow pear and cherry trees, strawberries, red currants and, best of all, they grow dinner!

The Hubby with cousin Michele and the Beamer in the veggie garden

The Beamer bonds with Yogi the dog who lets the Beamer pull his hair with the unwavering certainty that this is the way to True Love. The Hubby annoys both Sofie and her cousin Moses who are likely quite alarmed that this strange man is somehow related to them. Marty is a family doc and has advised one of his patients that personal and spiritual growth are only possible within the context of relationships. Exactly!

 Dinner is wild B.C. salmon, a salad of arugula and other lettuces from the garden, and chocolate raspberry cake with raspberries picked that morning from the raspberry bush. As Michele says, it is a zero mile dinner. The Hubby is very impressed by how his favourite cousin has turned into some sort of Kitchen Goddess. It almost dulls the painful memory of how she kicked his butt on the cross country ski track a few years back. He could forget completely, if only I would stop bringing it up!

Dinner on the deck chez M&M

We visit several wineries and conclude that the Okanagan wine region is an underdeveloped gem. The wines we try at Gray Monk, Summerhill, and Mission Hill are excellent and much less expensive than Napa wines. We dine on the outside terraces at both Gray Monk and Summerhill. The views of Okanagan Lake surrounded by hills on the far side and vines on the near side are stunning.

Gray Monk Winery

Peach Crisp as an Antidote to Loss

You would think, since I went on about how I was sad that the Adolescent was going to be at camp all summer, that I would not be bothered with Adolescent issues right now. But he seems to have a way of having a presence in my psyche that I can't ignore. Long story short, he came home for a week and early this morning returned to camp again. And now I'm having to feel all my sad missing him feelings all over again! Just before he left I said to him that I was going to miss him. He forced himself to look sad too. But he knew that I knew that he was faking it. He then gave that up and looked at me with a mixture of pity and disdain and said "I'm not going to miss you at all". I know this to be true but, really, just fake it! And fake it better! It's for the greater good. Has he learned nothing from me all these years?! The Daughter's been home all summer. She's been busy with work and her social life but I can see that she tries to give me a little attention and time now and then, not because of her own need but because of mine. Such a good daughter!

The Daughter and the Adolescent

I do feel bad that my children have to deal with these feelings of mine that I secretly believe if I was a better parent I would be able to resolve before there was any direct effect on them. But, on the other hand, I also believe that life is about relationships and relationships are all about Love and Loss. The Hubby has been experiencing Love and Loss at Starbucks. He has developed affection for most of the staff at our local store. He knows all their names and all their stories. They know exactly what he orders before he orders it. They give him little extras to show their appreciation. One staff recently told him that he was their best customer and this gave him a warm fuzzy feeling. But one by one the Hubby's beloved staff are all leaving Starbucks to go on to other things. The Hubby has taken each announcement in stride but each new departure makes him just a little sadder. His world is a little emptier. Love and loss...it's everywhere!

Whole wheat sourdough from Cob's - photo by the Daughter

My response to all this is to surround myself with the Love part to try and counterbalance the Loss part. And what is Love but Food?! We go out for Cuban food on Thursday night with Jon and Cathy. We go to dinner at Allison and Peter's on Friday. And tonight is dinner at our home with Mary and Mike. Mary, as you know, is a vegetarian. I'm slowly coming to realize that Food Love is still possible, even without meat!

Mary, Mike, and the Hubby

The Linguine with Uncooked Tomato, Arugula, and Olive Sauce I make is good...

Fresh tomato pasta

But the Love really shines in Peach Crisp. No fancy flavourings. Simply peaches and a crispy topping. Heaven. A taste of summer in your mouth. Sounds silly but I really did feel happier eating that dessert!

Peach Crisp with vanilla ice cream

Tomorrow morning the Daughter has requested that I make pancakes for breakfast for her and her friend Charlotte who has slept over! Yes, definitely yes! The sting from Loss is fading just a tiny bit.