Comings and Goings

The Adolescent

As much as the Adolescent's antics give me grief, I am surprisingly sad that he has just gone off to camp for the summer. He is a junior counselor at the camp where he has been a camper for many years. I'm not going to see him until the end of August! I really can't believe I'm feeling this but I miss him! To make myself feel better I try and remember all the aggravation he's caused me this year. But even that doesn't make me miss him less!

Blueberry Pancakes

I make him Blueberry Pancakes on the morning of his departure. So he'll remember why he should come home.

Brothers enjoying a goodbye hug

Although it doesn't look it from this face, the Beamer is really going to miss his brother too!
 

Even the Hubby is feeling sentimental!

The Adolescent has been thinking a lot these past few months about what he would like to do for his future career. It's come down to two things of equal interest. He wants to be an astrophysicist. And he wants to be rich. Seriously?! What the heck does an astrophysicist do anyway? And hasn't he been listening when I tell him that to be Rich in LOVE is what he should be striving for in life?! I suggest he get some books to read during downtime at camp. I'm thinking Hunger Games or something of that nature. He packs A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking, Cosmos by Carl Sagan, Elegant Universe by Brian Greene. Who is this boy?!

The Daughter, Claire, Charlotte, me

Charlotte and Claire have come from France for a visit. Charlotte lived with us for 3 months in 2006. Now she has come for her first visit back and has brought her younger sister Claire. Claire has never been on an airplane before! She eats corn on the cob for the first time! Their visit highlights yet again how little I cook. I vow to not let them leave this country again with a skewed view of how Canadians cook and eat.

Glass Noodle Salad with Edamame

Amidst all these comings and goings I have the strange and untimely urge to make a feast for Father's Day a couple of weeks back.

Asparagus Mimosa with capers and hard boiled egg

I make three dishes I've never tried before from the vegetarian cookbook Plenty by Yotam Ottolenghi.

Four Fathers - The Hubby, my Dad, Brian, and Richard

Lots of cooking and lots of eating leads to lots of cleaning up. Unbelievably, the dishwasher breaks. The groaning and complaining from the children when they realize they might have to wash a dish reminds me of yet another way I've failed as a parent. The only weapon left in the Kitchen Mess arsenal is the Hubby...but it's FATHER'S DAY! I struggle with a dilemma of conscience...

Did he or didn't he have to wash dishes on Father's Day???

The only outcome that you need to know is that THIS weekend we use paper plates and disposable glasses. I feel guilty about the waste but apparently my conscience can only deal with so much.
 

The family welcomes Charlotte and Claire

For Charlotte and Claire's dinner with my family I make Hamburgers. I read an article that the secret to the best burger ever is the ratio of meat to fat which should be 80% meat to 20% fat. The ground beef I get is 85/15 and it is excellent. Another thing I learn is that a great burger doesn't need any seasoning other than salt and pepper. No onion, no worcestershire sauce, no egg or breadcrumbs. Just some really great condiments and a good bun. The burgers are delicious and relieve my guilt just a bit!

The Comings are always something to anticipate and enjoy. But dealing with the Goings has never been my strength. I will likely get used to having the Adolescent away for the summer. I will likely learn to enjoy the peace and quiet that is only possible in a home without an Adolescent in it. I will in time find another motivation for baking. But until then, I will savour the unfamiliar feeling of missing the Adolescent.

To Ring or Not to Ring?

The Adolescent is maturing! How I know this to be true:

Immaturity is never far below the surface

It was the Adolescent's 17th birthday on the weekend. This in itself means nothing with respect to maturity. But, coupled with...

Scarlett colours Easter eggs to decorate the dinner table

At his birthday dinner, the Birthday Bell did not ring even once! The tradition at the birthday dinner table is that the Birthday Person gets full Power and Control of the Birthday Bell. With its ring, the Birthday Person can ask for ANYTHING!  Theoretically, when the bell rings, everyone around the dinner table jumps up and clambers to do whatever it is that the birthday person wants. This is how it happens in my fantasy anyway. Before the Adolescent was an adolescent he was given the birthday bell for one memorable birthday dinner. He rang that bell constantly. Everyone was going insane with the ringing and the demands. It was Power and Control gone amok in the hands of someone too young to respect the responsibility of it all. I lasted as long as I could but then I took the bell away. He claims that no bell rang this year due to emotional scarring. I suppose that some would consider this a byproduct of maturation!
 

The Adolescent with Sinikka and Gung Gung

The Adolescent is engaged and interactive during family dinners. What happened to the sullen, slouching, grunting boy of just a year or so ago? Today he chats, he tells funny stories, he asks people about themselves, he asks his sister for advice, he listens, he speaks of a future and how he wants to change the world for the better.

Richard, the Adolescent, and Trish flexing their muscles with Grandpa looking on

The Adolescent actually listening to Brian

The Adolescent eats the birthday cake I bake for him! Every year we go through this sad little ritual. I ask him what cake he wants me to bake. He says he'd prefer a cake from the grocery store. I really try and do what he has asked. I remind myself not to take this personally. I remind myself that it's not about me this day. I try and convince myself that if he wants a store bought cake that it takes nothing away from me to get him a store bought cake. I try but in the end I always fail.

So delicious!

But this year is different. We never even begin our sad predictable interaction. This year I bake him a Frozen Mocha Cake with Chocolate Ganache Glaze. Coffee mousse in the middle surrounded by chocolate meringue cake and covered in a rich chocolate glaze. This cake gets raves from everyone at the table. But will the Adolescent eat it? He tries a taste. It's delicious! He finishes the slice and then polishes off the rest of the cake later that night. I don't even recognize this boy.

Me and the Birthday Boy

Here's to many more years of birthday cakes that may or may not be eaten, to experiences that may (hopefully there's not too many of these) or may not scar, and to Birthday Bells that may or may not be rung! Happy Birthday Sweetie!

Cinnamon Love

The Adolescent and I have had a rough go of it recently. He's been asking for Cinnamon Buns but I've been resisting. They're a lot of work. They take a lot of time. And the warm fuzzies have not been felt much between us lately. But today I get the urge. It's a nasty fall day. Cold and windy and dreary out. The perfect day for baking. Comfort food. I know it's silly to think I can bake our love strong enough to withstand Adolescence. But, if anything can, it will be Cinnamon Buns .













There is mashed potato in the batter which makes these buns tender and moist. It's a baking session for the senses. First there's the irresistible smell of potatoes and butter. Then the sight of yeast foaming and bubbling and growing like some alien life form. Then there's the feeling of the sticky dough turning into smooth gorgeous substance under my kneading hands. As I'm kneading I realize that I didn't get the potatoes completely smooth and lump-free when mashing them so can feel little pea-size pieces of unmashed potato under my fingers. It's a little distracting but isn't at all apparent in the finished product.

The sound of my family salivating at the thought of what's to come and, finally, the taste of these decadent but really satisfying buns complete the experience.







The Adolescent has been doing the annoying things that adolescents do: thinking that he doesn't need me, acting like he thinks he's an adult, making his own (questionable) decisions. I know he's trying to figure out what kind of man he's going to be. I know he will eventually get to Amazing Man at his own sweet speed. But it would be a lot easier if he just realized that I KNOW HOW. All he has to do is LISTEN TO ME. But apparently that's not the way it's going to go. He has to do it for himself. Adolescents are so annoying!



But when I tell him I'm making Cinnamon Buns he THANKS ME. While the Buns are baking he HANGS AROUND ME. He eats one only five minutes out of the oven and he REMEMBERS WHAT HE APPRECIATES ABOUT ME. If only for a fleeting moment. Then he eats four more. This means that for four more fleeting moments he APPRECIATES ME. Ahhhh...!

I decide to put up with him for just one more day.

Birthday Muffins

I had almost succeeded in doing no cooking during my entire birthday weekend. As you know, I work very hard at not cooking. Never more so than on my birthday weekend. But then the Adolescent did something really sweet and I was compelled to bake for him. It was so odd to be baking for him without the usual motivation of needing to bake back our love. I hope the muffins turn out okay. Carrot Zucchini and Apple Muffins. When they're ready I let him know that he, and the friends who are over to "study", can indulge. He decides that he likes the muffins so much that he doesn't want to share them, that he wants them all for himself. What a lovely (selfish) boy!

The added LOVE makes these muffins very tender

The Adolescent seems to struggle every year on my birthday about what to give me for a gift. He hates to part with his money. This is fine with me because the best gift is something that he creates from his heart. However I know that even thinking this last sentence is enough to send an adolescent boy (or any male for that matter) running far far away while screaming. But deep deep down I know that he's a good son and wants to please his mother. Last year he wrote me a poem. I don't remember it all by heart but I do remember one line which was something about me losing at euchre and hoping that I wouldn't become a hooker (because, he told me at the time, euchre and hooker rhyme).

The Adolescent giving me my birthday present

Anyway, this year he shoves a crumpled piece of paper at me. He says "Here" (is a letter I wrote for you to express my inner sensitivity that I know will make your mother's heart sing). The words in parentheses in the previous sentence are what I'm CERTAIN are the words he was feeling but could not express directly. He doesn't want to read it to me but I force him to. He talks about that I think he's changed, that I think he's "some young hoodlum" but that he's actually the same person as before, just with a more "muscular outside". Then the clincher, near the end, is when the words "love", "cherish", AND "relationship" appear all in one sentence. He ends the letter by reminding me that it's his brain's fault.

Move aside, I have to preheat the oven.

Best Grilled Cheese Ever

I have high expectations that I will raise the Adolescent to become the Perfect Man. These hopes fade with each passing day...

Last night the Adolescent had a dilemma. He made himself two grilled cheese sandwiches. He makes the Best Grilled Cheese Ever. He settles in to really enjoy them. But they need ketchup. He looks in the fridge for the ketchup. Not there. Where could it be? He had ketchup a couple of nights ago and the bottle was half full. He asks me where is the ketchup? How do I know??? Then he discovers it, right where he left it a couple of nights ago, right by the couch where he chills. He asks me if it's ok to eat it. NO, definitely NO. He checks the label: Keep Refrigerated. He looks it up on the internet: Risky to eat due to bacterial growth. He carefully considers all the facts. Carefully considers all the risks. Really stretches that part of his adolescent brain that's responsible for good decision making. The answer is clear.

Clear as ketchup.

Parenting Rant #1

The question I'm pondering :

Why are adolescents saddled with such an ineffectual brain???

This involves no recipes or photos.

I must admit to myself that me doing a blog on food and recipes and cooking is kind of funny. Because I don't cook that often.  Maybe every other weekend. Edwin, who looks after the Beamer after school and cooks dinner for us on weeknights, is the one who I should be doing the blog about! So to fill in the huge gaps between my forays into the kitchen, I will fill these pages with the stuff about which I ponder. There is lots of this.

The Adolescent has only just returned to school after the holiday break. The FIRST day back he skips the last period of class. I ask him "Have you ever gotten away with skipping school?". He says when he skips he always gets caught...and consequenced. Why would he skip a class, to have maybe an extra hour of free time, knowing with certainty that the consequences will far outweigh the fleeting pleasure of having an extra hour off school? Big discussion follows. Exasperation (me) and blank looks (him) abound. We conclude that he can't help it, it's his adolescent brain.

Any insights into this from my loyal readers (I know there's at least one) would be welcomed.